just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
