Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I can tuck mytits in my pants
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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