Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Randomize
