I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
