Whod you bang
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
