oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize