Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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