He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Randomize
