If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
