I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
