Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
