; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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