I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
