Kiss
Puke
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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