even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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