dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
