he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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