Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
