I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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