Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
There r osticjed everywhere
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
