Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
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