yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
