Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
