yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
