So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize