you guys were way drunker than both of me
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
