she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
