My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize