i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Randomize
