awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
I have post one night stand depression
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