fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
