i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize