haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
