No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
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