Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
