There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
