just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
