She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
