shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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