going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Sorry about my life...
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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