i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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