do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
