I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
