I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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