Duck Duck Cougar?
they need to just BURY HIM!
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Randomize
