my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
