**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
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