awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Randomize
