I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
