i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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