i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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