dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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