garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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